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Post by JessieLou on Apr 28, 2015 23:54:43 GMT -5
Two years ago, Grace Slick turned me into a 70's whore. A few months later I began listening to AT40 on a weekly basis again, but instead of exclusively 80's shows like I listened to when I was in high school, this time I started listening to the 70's shows. I discovered so much amazing music while listening to these shows, but with good also comes bad, and with bad also comes the SUPER evil and geezerly. And in (dis)honor of those songs, here are my top 100 least favorite songs of the 70's! **DISCLAIMER: This list and all the comments are in good fun and if you are a fan of any of these songs I will not judge you.**100. Geezer Lightfoot - The Repetitiveness Of Edmund Fitzgerald (1976)
I actually do not dislike Gordon Lightfoot that much ("Sundown" is a jam), and even this song itself is not that bad... that is, if it were shorter. What ruins it for me is that it goes ON AND ON AND ON. I felt like I was going crazy when I first heard this. I mean, I feel kinda bad because the story is sad but the song still blows. 99. Paul Simon - (My Career Is) Slip Slidin' Away (1977)Another song that made me go batshit crazy when I first heard it. Talk about REPETITIVE! The entire song is him saying "slip slidin' away" 384 times. WE GET IT. YOU'RE SLIP SLIDIN' AWAY. GOD. Give me "50 Ways To Louvre Your Lover" over this any day, and while you're at it, some iTunes gift cards as well. 98. Three Dog Night - The Screamfest Must Go On (1974)
I usually like them, but this song gives me a HUGE headache. This is nothing but circus noises and SCREAMING. Is this Three Dog Night or is this Jessie J?! I'll be sticking with "Shambala" and "Black And White", thank you very much. 97. John Denver - Annie's Song (Is A Really Boring One) (1974)YAWN. One of his most boring songs - and that's saying something because they're all borefests! 96. Dr. Hook & The Medicine Show - Sylvia's Mother (Is A Skank) (1972)I'm sure Bebe Reptar is disappointed at the low placement, but I don't find this as terrible as he does. Don't get me wrong, this is REALLY bad and cringeworthy, but there are 95 songs from this decade that I find far worse, including... 95. The Whoors - Hate Her Madly (1971)Oh lawd, THEM again. One of the most overrated bands of all-time with yet another boring, uninspired song. Seriously, Jim sounds bored out of his mind on this song. And speaking of overrated... 94. Lynyrd Skynyrd - Shitty And Overrated Alabama (1974)I'm probably going to get a lot of shit for this one, but I don't care. I've always hated this song, but what makes me hate it even more is that it's CONSTANTLY overplayed and shoved down my throat and so many people make this song and this band in general out to be the second coming of Jesus. This does absolutely nothing for me. 93. Donny Osmond - (Why Am I Singing About) Puppy Love (When I'm, Like, 5?) (1972)A kid Scott Bungalow's age singing about "puppy love". This commentary writes itself! 92. Jermaine Whackson - Daddy's Not Home (1972)You're boring! 91. Bay City Douchebags - (Throwing My Radio Out The Window Whenever I Hear) Saturday Night (1976)Another headache-inducing anthem! Seriously, what a cheesy piece of crap. Why was this a thing?!?!?! COMING UP: 81. A medley of two very famous songs from a very famous rock band. 82. A 1975 hit that I first heard through an episode of Lizzie McGuire. 83. Apparently one of the admins of this board is a female. 84. Up until last year when I heard this song for the first time, I thought this was a song specifically made for The Simpsons. 85. Hey look! The guy who also sings song #83! 86. And here he is again! 87. The debut single from by far my least favorite solo female of the 70's. 88. This artist also sings the #89 song. 89. Michael Bolton's "Said I Loved You... But I Lied" is "The Mean Song". This, however, is "The Lying Song"! 90. A country song from the same year as "The Lying Song".
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Post by FreakyFlyBry on Apr 29, 2015 0:06:34 GMT -5
I must agree with "Puppy Love"... Osmond family stuff, especially the solo stuff and Donny/Marie cover duets from the 70's is generally quite cheesy. "Daddy's Home" was nothing special, nor was "Sylvia's Mother" (I also don't think it's THAT bad...) For some reason, I don't think "Annie's Song" is awful either. I like "The Show Must Go On", but it's definitely not Three Dog Night's best. I like "The Wreck Of The Edmund Fitzgerald", "Slip Slidin' Away", and "Love Her Madly", though all those artists have had better. "Sweet Home Alabama" and "Saturday Night" are my favourites from their respective artists. 83 must be "My Girl Bill" from Jim Stafford. And 87 is Helen Reddy. 81... Queen "We Will Rock You/We Are The Champions"?
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Post by Matt on Apr 29, 2015 3:34:07 GMT -5
Hilarious Jessielou! Thanks for the laugh.
I had 87 guessed right away as Smellen Not-Ready.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 29, 2015 8:44:35 GMT -5
"The rekt of the Edmund Fitzgerald", "Sylvia's Mother(f**ker)", "Slip Slidin' Away (to the Stuck EP)" and "Saturday Night (Hot Yukon Blonde Remake") are all smashes.
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Post by JessieLou on Apr 30, 2015 11:21:34 GMT -5
90. Willie Nelson - (My) Blue Eyes (Are) Crying In the Rain (Because I Have To Hear This Annoying Crap) (1975)Another one of the most overrated artists of all-time. Seriously, what the hell is this? This is BORING and he CANNOT SING! LEARN TO SING. NOW. GOD. 89. John Denver - The Lying Song (1975)Also known as "I'm Sorry/Calypso" - and the reason why it's "The Lying Song" is because if he was really as sorry as he claims to be in this song, why would this be one of the three songs that prevented "Miracles" from #1? To quote @whoselinefan, that is SO not cool. The song being boring as all hell also doesn't help matters. But there are actually two other songs from him that I find worse than this, including... 88. John Denver - Geezerness On My Shoulders (1974)Seriously, does this dude have ANY interesting songs?? Everything is a ballad with this guy!! 87. Helen Not-Reddy - I Don't Know How To Record A Good Song (1971)Oh lawd. The one that started it all. I have not been as exposed to this as her other hits, but it's still terrible nonetheless. Expect plenty more from her still to come. 86. Jim Stafford - Spiders And Snakes (Suck, Just Like This Song) (1973)I was actually first introduced to this song in 2010, believe it or not. My Mom played it a lot around the time she stopped being friends with this crazy woman named Carmen (I feel like @wife is going to start making fun of that now, like he did with my fork-humping cousin). I hated it then, and I still hate it now. This brotha just cannot SING! Seriously, how do these people get record deals?? 85. Jim Stafford - (You Have Serious Issues If) Your Bulldog Drinks Champagne (1974)If your bulldog drinks champagne, you have no business owning a bulldog tbh. 84. C.W. McCall - (Why Should I Get A) Convoy (When You're Being Annoying As Shit About It?) (1975)There was an episode of The Simpsons years ago that had this song in it, and in January of last year when I first heard this song I was surprised because I didn't think it was an actual song. It's annoying though, it sounds like a commercial jingle! And this went to #1 over "Miracles". WELL I NEVER. 83. Jim Stafford - My Girl Bill (Is A Skank) (1974)Seriously, WHO NAMES A GIRL BILL??? THAT'S EVEN WORSE THAN NAMING YOUR CHILD JUICE. GOD. 82. War - Why Can't We Make A Good Song? (1975)This song is annoying and lacks lyrics. The ENTIRE chorus is them shouting WHY CAN'T WE BE FRIENDS!!11 We can't be friends because your music blows. NEXT! 81. Queen - We Will Give You A Headache/We Are The Champions Of Overratedness (1977)I better anticipate those angry PM's now! Sorry, but I tried so hard to get into Queen, and while there are A FEW songs I don't mind ("Another One Bites The Dust" is a jam), overall I find them to be very overrated. I mainly dislike "We Are The Champions" due to overplay, the one I REALLY can't stand out of these two is "We Will Rock You". Terrible song, gives me a migraine every single time. This is their only appearance on the list, but as if this didn't make any of you angry enough - "Bohemian Rhapsody" was considered for this list, but it missed. COMING UP: 71. A novelty hit from 1972 that caused me to shout profanities in my brother's car. 72. I honestly can't think of good hint for this. It's from a band, it was released in 1973, and it sucks. There, that's my hint. 73. A teeny bopper group's attempt to do a rock song. 74. A solo single from one of the members of said teeny bopper group. 75. Evelyn "Champagne" King has a song with a similar title. 76. The Chris Brown of the 70's. 77. One-hit-wonder girl group from 1977. 78. The first appearance from everyone's favorite geezerly duo! 79. How someone goes from one of the most offensive songs of the 70's to doing music for Toy Story, I don't know. 80. The artist formerly known as Mrs. Kris Kardashian.
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Post by FreakyFlyBry on Apr 30, 2015 11:29:31 GMT -5
I disagree with "Why Can't We Be Friends" and especially "We Will Rock You/We Are The Champions", love those! Don't know the Helen Reddy song, but knowing her, it probably sucks. I didn't like the Willie Nelson song either. Still, it's not as bad as his cheesefest "To All The Geezers Who Sing These Songs". Don't like either of those John Denver songs, I especially can't stand "I'm Sorry". "Convoy" is okay for the occasional listen though it's not something I'd go out of the way to hear. Can't stand Jim Stafford. I hope his drug song "Wildwood Weed" is still to come, that was awful! 73... Osmonds "Crazy Horses"? 76... Gary Glitter "Rock And Roll Part 2"? 77... Hot "Angel In Your Arms"? 78 must be the Captain & Tennille. 79... Randy Newman "Short People"? 80... Rita Coolidge?
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Post by Deleted on Apr 30, 2015 12:02:13 GMT -5
Wow, I knew "Spiders and Snakes" nearly a full decade before JessieLou! It's a good thing #81 was the last song on the list because I literally quit reading it as soon as I saw it.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 30, 2015 15:37:15 GMT -5
JessieLou I forgot all about Anthony from Pennsylvania, who was born on December 4th.
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Post by JessieLou on Apr 30, 2015 16:09:00 GMT -5
JessieLou I forgot all about Anthony from Pennsylvania, who was born on December 4th. He's from New York.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 30, 2015 21:12:37 GMT -5
JessieLou I forgot all about Anthony from Pennsylvania, who was born on December 4th. He's from New York. Didn't he live in Pennsylvania in 2006/07?
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Post by JessieLou on Apr 30, 2015 21:17:34 GMT -5
He's from New York. Didn't he live in Pennsylvania in 2006/07? No, in 2006 my family and his family reunited on vacation in Pennsylvania, so that might've been what you were thinking of.
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Post by Matt on May 1, 2015 3:00:04 GMT -5
Willy Smellson - agreed. What's with him and titles with 'blue' in them? And he just had his birthday so he's not 81 anymore What was Lizzy McGuire (ie Hilary) thinking using that John Denver song? I pretty much can't stand any of his songs. Isn't he the one who inspired that amazing Hampton The Hamster remix? John Dever again. Ergh. Smellen Not-Ready. After hearing she was Aussie (help!), I had to check out some of her stuff a while back. Wow what a mistake that was. I'll never get those precious minutes of my life back. Looking forward to what order her tragic-tracks appear in on your list Jim Stafford - Oh dear LORD this was terrible. Jim Stafford again - I don't know this one, but I'm assuming it's worse than "Spiders and Snakes." He has a real animal theme going on. C.W. McCall - Ohhhh I remember this I must've heard this on one of one of dad's radio stations, and YES, totally Simpsons! Jim again? - Seriously?? War - This was enough to want to start a war of my own. Queen - This one was bearable for me, but I too have never been a real big Queen fan like EVERY SINGLE OTHER PERSON SEEMS TO BE.
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Post by JessieLou on May 1, 2015 10:47:12 GMT -5
What was Lizzy McGuire (ie Hilary) thinking using that John Denver song? I pretty much can't stand any of his songs. Isn't he the one who inspired that amazing Hampton The Hamster remix? the song I first heard on Lizzie was Why Can't We Be Friends, though come to think of it I actually think they used the Smash Mouth version
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Post by JessieLou on May 1, 2015 17:43:10 GMT -5
80. Rita Uncoolidge - (Your Song Keeps Getting) Repetitive & Repetitive (1977)I feel like for a brief time last summer, I kept hearing this song like it was a current. AT40 were airing 1977 shows a lot so I constantly heard it there, the radio, the store, THEY ALL KEPT PLAYING IT!! If it wasn't for the incredibly random overplay this probably would've missed the list, but constantly hearing this has quickly made me go from disliking this to absolutely HATING it. And not to mention, she sounds bored out of her mind while she's singing this. Although then again, I'd sound bored all the time too if I was married to Kris Kardashian. 79. Randy Newman - (I'm Racist Against) Short People (And Therefore Should Take My Fungus Somewhere Else) (1978)Um, what the hell is this? Not only is this incredibly annoying, but he's making offensive remarks about short people! Yes, I understand that he's not really prejudice and that he's singing from a prejudice person's perspective, but still, HOW did a song like this go all the way to #2?! And to think years later he did the music for Toy Story. Never enter my ears again! 78. Craptain & Tennille - You Never Done A Shitty Song Like That (Oh Wait, Of Course We Have!) (1978)First appearance from the geezers to end all geezers! Craptain & Tennille + Neil Sedaka + a perverted song title (the actual title is "You Never Done It Like That") = A MESS. What I don't understand is that this album was a huge flop but this managed to go top 10 on the Billboard Hot 100. How the hell does that work?! Expect more from these muskrat lovers still to come! 77. Not Hot - Geezer In Your Arms (1977)This is another song that I was first introduced to by my Mom. She had this on a CD and I overheard her listening to it and it was driving me INSANE. If they say "the angel in your arms this morning is going to be the devil in someone else's arms tonight" ONE MORE TIME, I will throw the BITCH FIT to end ALL bitch fits. WE GET IT. YOUR MAN CHEATED ON YOU SO YOU'RE CHEATING BACK. GOD. Glad we never heard from these mofos again! 76. David Soul - Don't Give Up On My Geezerness (1978)When I first heard this song, I didn't like it. However, now knowing what it's actually about, I cannot STAND it. I don't even remember how we got on the topic of DAVID SOUL of all people, but my Dad told me that he used to beat up his wife. I looked it up for myself because I wanted to see if it was true, and it was, and that's what this song is about. Seriously, you're telling her don't give up on us when YOU'RE the one who royally f*cked up? Dude, f*ck you. 75. Shirley & The Screamers - Shame, Shame Shame (That You Have To Scream Like A Nut Job) (1975)And this, my friends, is a song that was heavily influential on Jessie J. That chorus is just BRUTAL. OMG STOP SCREAMING. WE GET IT. IT'S A SHAME, SHAME, SHAME, SHAME, SHAME. GOD. 74. Donny Osmond - Go Away Little Girl (1971)I didn't have to mess with that title because, again, it writes for itself. Donny Osmond sounds like a little girl on this song and I want him to go away and retire from music forever. 73. The Osmonds - Hey Look! We're Rock Stars Now! (1972)Actual title is "Crazy Horses", and if you've heard the song you'll know what I gave it that title. This was their attempt to do a hard rock song and it's a HOT MESS. I still have nightmares just thinking about this song. 72. War - Me And Baby Brother (Are Both Annoying) (1973)Yet another annoying, repetitive song from one of the worst groups of the 70's. NEXT! 71. The Delegates - (Hot Mess) Convention '72 (1972)It all started one morning in November 2013. I couldn't hear all of the 1972 AT40 show that was airing because it ended at 10 and I had a shift at 9:30. Shortly before I had to leave the car to go to work, my brother and I hung out for a bit in the car. Casey introduced this song, which neither of us have ever heard before. Mike was confused and wasn't sure what it was supposed to be, and I kept shouting WHAT THE f*ck IS THIS CRAP THIS IS GIVING ME A HEADACHE. When I came home later that day I wrote a MAJOR rant about it in the AT40 thread: 8: CONVENTION '72 - THE DELEGATES - ONE OF THE WORST "SONGS" I HAVE EVER HEARD IN MY LIFE? WHAT THE HELL IS THIS? WERE PEOPLE DOING THAT MUCH DOPE IN THE 70'S THAT THEY FELT THE NEED TO BUY THIS CRAP? ALL IT IS IS TALKING WITH SOME SONG CLIPS RANDOMLY THROWN IN. I COULD'VE DONE THIS SHIT!! HORRIBLE!! OMG. Seriously, what a MESS. I don't hate it AS much ever since Mike and I parodied these types of songs in Sebastian's "#Justice4Lita", but it's still a hot mess nonetheless. COMING UP: 61. For some reason, this was the #1 song of 1974. 62. The theme from what is possibly the most geezerly movie of all-time. 63. Another song that I thought was specifically for The Simpsons! 64. I used to hate this disco artist's first hit but it recently grew on me. Her second single, which was a minor hit, is here at #64. 65. Craptain & Tennille did this song too! 66. Same artist as #65. 67. One of the most RANDOM artists to make it big in 1975. 68. One of two appearances from this artist - on this one though, he isn't pretending to be a chicken. 69. A blatant rip-off of "Wild World" by Cat Stevens. 70. This is Whitney Houston's "My Name Is Not Susan" if it were a boring cheesefest.
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Post by Deleted on May 1, 2015 20:18:41 GMT -5
"Crazy Horses" is amazing. Without it, there would be no Mastodon.
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